Oh the Secrets that Victoria holds

So...I told you that I work part time at Victoria's Secrets, well I worked a rare two nights straight Wednesday and Thursday. These are the stories of my shift

Female Shopper #1, late 40's - She comes in asking for cotton panties, I direct her to the 3 tables full of cotton panties and ask her if she is looking for a particular style, she says not granny panties, so I show her an example of the String Bikini, the Hi-leg brief, the hiphuggers and the boy shorts, she chooses the hiphuggers and ask the price, I tell her 1 for $7.50 and 5 for $25, she says that is too much she just needs to throw on a pair because she just pissed on herself, WTF.

Male Shopper #1, late 30's early 40's - He ask for some conservative for his wife, something sexy for his girlfriend and something slutty for his secretary. Wife, Girlfriend, and Secretary, WTF.

Female Shopper #2, 16 - 17 tops, - She wants to find something that will make her boyfriend cum in his pants, I said sweetheart you could were a pair of granny panties and a wife beater and a teenage boy will come in his pant, she says but he is 19 and a freshman in college and she wants to compete with the girls at his school, my response - darling you are too young to be trying to compete for some boys attention, either he wants you or he doesn't, please don't grow up to quickly, she starts to cry and leaves the store, WTF.

Female Shopper #3, mid to late 20's, - She needs edible underwear and anal beads, I inform her that we don't sell that and direct her to the Pleasure Chest, an adult novelties store and she tells me only sluts and freaks go in there, so I just look at her and raises an eyebrow, she turns red, get all insulted and leaves.

Male Shopper #2, early 30's, - He ask for 50 pair of the panties with the thin string up the ass (his exact words), so he spent $250 on V-String panties in every color and design.

I work again on Sunday, I'm sure I'll have more stories for you then.

I'm just not that young anymore

So...Last night TD, ES and I, took our friend YW out to celebrate her completing Nursing School (She really deserved to celebrate, she has worked full time, raised her daughter, goes to school and manages to work clinicals on the weekends for the last 7 years, I'm truly proud of her) Any way, we go to this place called the Bamboo lounge in Center City. At first we thought the place was going to be corny because it was so empty and because the clientele at the time was sort of laid back. But by 10:30 the club was starting to get hot. Initially it was just me, VW and TD and this old ass man sitting across from us, who had been staring at us for about an hour like we were a X-rated movie, bought us a round of drinks and proceeded to tell us how beautiful we are and then walks back to his seat. Well in walks ES and all the black men in the club get an instant attitude because this white dude is getting all this love from the 3 of us. So any way, we each by YW a drink and it's on, the DJ was hot, after ES gave the cocktail waitress his card and told her to start a tab, the drinks was flowing, the dancing started , we had a ball. There was a group of people at the table next to us celebrating someone's birthday, well one of the guys started dancing with YW and then they all wanted to dance with us, even the girls. So the 4 of us basically get the party jumping and before you knew it the place was jam packed and the 4 of us were right in the middle of the fun. This one white guy followed poor YW all night like a little puppy, he just wouldn't leave her alone it was hilarious and then this old guy was telling me how nice my "jugs jiggled", what the f*ck!!!!. Then this dude like 3 feet tall kept asking TD all this music trivia, finally I just screamed "Who the hell are you Alex Trebek!!!!!!! Go sit down somewhere!!!" He was really starting to annoy me. So at around 1:45 we decide to go get something to eat because we are all starving except for ES, but he goes anyway, then we get there and he orders the most food, go figure, so we are at the diner eating having a ball when TD's BF calls and she starts rushing us to leave, the nerve of some people. Needless to say we had an absolute fantastic time, YW had fun and that was the point of the evening, now at 9:30 am I have not been to sleep, I'm still a little hungover and I'm at work, what the hell made me think I could pull this off, I look like shit and I feel like shit, never again!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh The Holiday Party

So...I'm on the event committee at work and I took on the awesome task of planning our company's Holiday Party which took place this past Friday. Well for the most part planning was a breeze, everything went off with out a hitch, I got into a few spats with people complaining about there not being enough food (we had butlered appetizers for 4 hours, hot appetizers for 4 hours and entrees for 4 hours and desserts for 2 hours, greedy bastards) and someone complaining that the DJ didn't play what they wanted to hear,( the DJ announced several times to give him request because he didn't really know what we were looking for but they refused to make a request, f*cking morons) but I digress, the party was off the hook!!!! Every one enjoyed themselves, this HOT ASS sales guy at my company kissed me and I got a coochie hiccup, but alas he is married and it was on my cheek, so oh well. My department was truly drunk as a skunk, I mean OMG!!!!!! Deb and the crew were wasted!!! It was hilarious. Then there is this girl that sits on the other side of my building and she was so drunk I'm not sure she knew she was dancing by herself. I almost hooked up but I wasn't drunk enough (D & J, don't ask because I truly am not telling who tried to get me on the second floor of the IPB) I saw a few disturbing sites but nothing to quite make me nauseous. Over all a good time was had by all. Off to snuggle with MM, maybe I'll tell you about it tomorrow.

Brrrrrrrrrrrr!

So...It is colder than a witch's titty in Philly today. I had to park at the end of my block last night, so this morning Missy and I have to walk a 1/2 block to get to the car. On the way the wind is blowing like crazy and with water in her eyes she looks at me and says "Mommy please tell the wind to stop slapping me", Ahhhhh! I didn't know whether to laugh or cry.

I just don't get it?!

So...as I said previously I work part time at Victoria's Secret, well last night I'm at work and we currently have a promotion in which you get a free lip gloss with any purchase. So, I'm ringing this gentlemen up and I tell him about the lip gloss assuming it was for his lady companion. He proceeds to take it from me and in the mirror next to the cash register, He Puts It On!!!! Now if it was clear it wouldn't have really bothered me so much but it was BRIGHT RED!!!!! That's not all, I'm still ringing up his purchases which include a pink and black bustier and 2 water bras and 10 pair of sexy little things panties (all of which are pink, black and red thongs), among other things, so he takes one of the thongs and places it in front of his groin area and thinks, out loud, I hope these fit. Then ask me the return policy. Now, I am not here to judge, homosexuality is a choice and who am I to even care about what you do, but cross dressing I just don't get! Who knew this was going to be such an enlightening job.

Such a Slacker

I know, I know I truly slacked. I guess I just lost momentum. However, I will quickly bring you up to date on the going ons in my life...
1. Missy turned 3 on November 14th and now goes around telling people that she is grown and works on Broad St. ( I don't know what she does on Broad Street and quite frankly I'm scared to ask.)
2. MM and I are doing quite well lately. I have no regrets and the sex is still absolutely amazing.
3. Missy now has an agent. A modeling agency in NJ signed her and she is now being "shopped" around for modeling and/or acting jobs. ( I sure hope I can quit my job one day)
4. This lady at my job, let's call her "the mumbler" is really starting to where thin on my nerves. Besides the fact that she is always mumbling and I can hardly ever understand a damn thing she says, she is annoying as hell asking me stupid question and making dumb comments, I have a very low tolerance for annoying people with idiotic questions.
5. I am currently working at Victoria's Secret part-time for the holidays. I like it so far since it hasn't become burdensome. They keep my hours down to around 12-15/week which is quite manageable.
6. I was passed over for promotion because of my temper. The day they made the decision was the same day, I literally cursed out The Mumbler. That really sucks but I'm not concerned b/c I don't plan on being here much longer anyway.

Well for the most part those are the highlights of my life. HOW PATHETIC!!!
So...I promise to do better and I can't blame Debbie because she has truly been on me about posting. How proud she'll be of me today!!!